Monday, November 29, 2010

FFoB 19: 7 Sayings of Jesus on the Cross

The seven sayings form part of a Christian meditation that is often used during Lent, Holy Week and Good Friday. The traditional order of the sayings is:

1. Father forgive them, for they know not what they do (Luke 23:34).
2. Truly, I say to you, today you will be with me in paradise (Luke 23:43).
3. Woman, behold your son: behold your mother (John 19:26-27).
4. My God, My God, why have you forsaken me? (Eli Eli lama sabachthani Matthew 27:46 and Eloi Eloi lama sabachthani Mark 15:34).
5. I thirst (John 19:28).
6. It is finished (John 19:30).
7. Father, into your hands I commit my spirit (Luke 23:46).

Sunday, November 21, 2010

My Old Sermons (a reflection)

All my new sermons are stored at the church website found here. Since that archiving process only began in 2008, all my older sermons are not stored online there. Technically, I could still put them on the church website, but I'd rather not. It is too much trouble to ask for all the old sermons from all the pastors and guest speakers to complete those old series. My old sermons alone would appear rather out of place as miscellaneous pieces of incomplete series. So for 3 months since September, I have been slowly uploading all of them in this blog. Some came from a series in Proverbs, some from the 10 Commandments, some from Sermon on the Mount, some from John and some from topical sermons on the Body. I also have a bigger collection on 1 Corinthians (1, 2, 4, 6, 7, 10, 12, 13, 15a, 15c, 16). I had more in this particular series because it is a huge series and by this time (2007) my preaching schedule has intensified.

Reading through my old sermons as I upload them, I have a few thoughts.
1. My sermons used to be a lot longer. This gradual shift over the years is because I placed more and more emphasis on brevity, and making sure that just a single point is driven home. My old sermons are well-rounded, covering all angles possible. In some way it is like a paper for a theological college. But my newer sermons are more focused. I make sure that the listeners learn something new that Sunday morning, and I leave out the peripheral padding. I do appreciate my old sermons. They are a worthy analysis on a given subject (in my opinion). But they don't serve well as a sermon. A sermon should be exhortation based. Say something heartfelt and insightful.

2. I often realize that what I have written is better than myself. I know this because when I reread them, I learn new things from them afresh. How could I learn things that I have written myself previously? The reason is twofold. Firstly, I was reading from commentaries as I wrote. The further insights belonged to the scholars and did not originate from myself. Over time, I have forgotten about them. And as I reread, I learn these insights anew. Secondly, I believe it is the guiding of the Holy Spirit. The HS often gives me wisdom beyond my weaknesses. Even in a teaching session, I am often surprised by the analogies and memorable lines that is uttered in the spur of the moment. It is the HS at work, reinforcing the preparation which is of course also necessary.

3. I do have some extreme duds that I am too embarrassed even to upload here. Which really goes to show the amount of patience and kindness the congregation has bestowed upon me over the years. They have given me a chance to mature, and a chance to learn from my own mistakes. Many times, I am my worst critic. Well, if they have the graciousness to overlook my flaws, perhaps I should forgive my own blunders too.

Thursday, November 18, 2010

论报复 On Retaliation

经文:马太福音第5章38到42节。 38你们听见有话说:'以眼还眼,以牙还牙。' 39只是我告诉你们:不要与恶人作对。有人打你的右脸,连左脸也转过来由他打; 40有人想要告你,要拿你的里衣,连外衣也由他拿去; 41有人强逼你走一里路,你就同他走二里; 42有求你的,就给他;有向你借贷的,不可推辞。

今天,我们探讨另一个很实际的课题。那就 是谈“报复”。报复是人与人关系必然面对的课题。从小时候打架,斗嘴,就开始了人与人之间的纷争。打就要打赢,争就要争赢,讲也要讲赢,这是适者生存的道 理。要是打不赢,讲输了怎么办?那就搬救兵,叫父母还是老师来评理,总之要扳回一局。结果,父母一来听到打架,两个都罚。没关系,这也算是一种报复,这是 孩童阶段学习的报复。我记得以前看武侠小说,电视连续剧,功夫电影,总是有一个熟悉的故事。一个大恶人出现,干尽恶事,可是,他却忽略了一个小孩子。等到 那孩子长大懂事后一定会记住两句话,就是我们大家也很熟悉的“杀父之仇,不共戴天”,“君子报仇,十年不晚”。然后,这孩子就会有一段奇遇,练成绝世武 功。最后,这孩子杀了大恶人,报复成功,大快人心,完美收场。所以,这种“有仇不报非君子,有恩不报枉为人”的人生哲学,对许多人来说早就习以为常。我相 信对大家来说,工作场所的尔虞我诈,钩心斗角,应该一点都不陌生。就算是一家人之间,为了家产,为了争面子,还是为了争一口气,家庭成员之间一来一往的讽 刺,嫉妒,臭骂,甚至仇恨,都不是稀有的事。从个人到家族,从公司到商场,甚至国于国之间,永不停息的斗争,接二连三的报复,相信大家都不陌生。

对 于人生中免不了要面对的这个课题,上帝自然也要面对,并且上帝也要显明自己的旨意。登山宝训是形容一个上帝的国度,而耶稣是这个国度的君王。他需要在这个 关于报复和纷争的事上,让他的子民晓得如何来处理。神的子民要以耶稣的道来作为活在神国度里的生活准则。可是,这不意味着耶稣在制造新的条例,耶稣说: “莫想我来要废掉律法和先知;我来不是要废掉,乃是要成全。”耶稣又说:“我告诉你们:你们的义若不胜于文士和法利赛人的义,断不能进天国。”文士和法利 赛人的义又是什么呢?就是指很片面、以自我为中心来了解律法。摩西的律法有言:“以眼还眼,以牙还牙”。当时的犹太人领袖却扭曲了它原来的精神,把原属于 司法界的公理,沦为私人寻仇报复的理由。

讲到这里,我在网络上刚好找到一篇李敖先生误解此律法的讲说,以下是李敖的话: “我告诉大家,我觉得我比别人聪明。为什么聪明呢?因为我不太被人家骗,我才变得很聪明。我自己有一种力量,内发的力量,那种力量,我告诉大家,没有人教 我,可是我主动学来的,向什么人学来的,向以色列人学来的,向犹太人学来的。我跟大家说,犹太人是全世界人缘里面最坏的,为什么呢?因为这种人内聚性特别 强,换句话说呢,他的小团体非常严密,非常的排外,对别人不信任,斤斤计较,占别人便宜,可是犹太人有他一些基本的精神和信念,是我李敖所佩服的。我举个 例子,我们中国人讲,吃亏就是占便宜,犹太人从来不这样想,犹太人想,吃亏就是吃亏,那我吃亏了我还能活吗?我被人骗了我能活吗?好歹我要占便宜回来,这 是犹太人。所以犹太人的信仰是什么?以眼还眼,以牙还牙,没有说我原谅你了,我以德报怨了,没有这个事,你欺负我了,你整了我了,我就是跟你干到底。”

“我 李敖就这种人犹太人,我告诉大家,为什么我喜欢犹太人,代表有正义感,我的名言是说,注意喔,那个能够有仇不报的人,就是忘恩负义的人,这两种人是一种 人。为什么呢?他有仇不报的人,他这个人是非观念不明确,含糊,所以他就会对你忘恩负义,所以我喜欢那种有仇必报的人。可是你李敖是不是器量太小了,有仇 必报,错了,当我报了仇,我惩罚了我的仇人以后,我的仇人被我惩罚了以后,他向我低头,或者他认错以后,他可以变成我的好朋友,我会原谅他,可是一定要经 过惩罚经过制裁。我有很多好朋友,是我以前的仇人,在法院都被我告过的,不是吗?这就是我的标准。”

李敖把旧约的“以眼还眼,以牙还牙” 解释成追根究底的报复心理。他觉得这样才有正义感,有仇不报的人反而是忘恩负义的人,因为是非不分。当时候的犹太人领袖,相信也是有同样的想法。这是错误 的。正如耶稣所说,我们不可与恶人作对。意思就是我们不可以恶人的方法来回报恶人。因为恶人以恶待我们,那已经是错了。如果我们自己以恶人的方法回报,其 实我们也成了恶人,而整个情况只有恶上加恶,绝对没有公义。如果我们因为为了报复而恶上加恶,那才是真正的是非不分。

那么“以眼还 眼,以牙还牙”是怎么解释呢?其实“以眼还眼,以牙还牙”是法官或公正人,用来衡量赔偿或还公道的指标。在古时候,没有律法的社会,对于报复根本没有节 制。你打我一拳,我可以要你的命;你杀我一个人,我可以杀你全村。所以在创世记4章23到24,就有一个叫拉麦的人这样说: 23拉麦对他两个妻子说:"亚大、洗拉,听我的声音;拉麦的妻子细听我的话语:壮年人伤我,我把他杀了;少年人损我,我把他害了。 24若杀该隐,遭报七倍;杀拉麦,必遭报七十七倍。"

这是一个没有法制的社会的写照。 因此在摩西的律法中,“以眼还眼,以牙还牙”的原则本来是要控制无节制的报复,在律法上澄清受害人得到应有的赔偿。 所以犹太人领袖要把律法界的评审指标,用来做个人的报复理由是不合理的。耶稣明白律法的精神是要限制报复,而绝不可能是要纵容报复,或鼓励报复的心理。在 这里我刚才已经讲明了,做个人的报复,只有恶上加恶,不但向你行恶的人是犯了罪,你以恶回报的时候,你也同样是犯了罪。

然而,主耶稣 的“有仇不报”并不是一种消极的退让,也不是向恶势力低头;更不是要息事宁人,当作什么也没发生过的阿Q精神。耶稣与这世上的罪恶是绝对对立的。耶稣的使 命是解决仇恨。耶稣的国度是要来停止暴力,因此耶稣的身份是和平之君。耶稣所以不容许报复,是因为报复不能解决问题的根源。有一句老话说:冤冤相报何时 了?那么耶稣如何如何来解决问题呢?耶稣说:“有人打你的右脸,连左脸也转过来由他打;有人想要告你,要拿你的里衣,连外衣也由他拿去;有人强逼你走一里 路,你就同他走二里;有求你的,就给他;有向你借贷的,不可推辞。”

现在想象如果你是一个恶人,你用很羞辱的方式反手打人的右脸;被 打的人反而拿左脸给你打,你会有什么反应?你会乘机左脸也打下去?也许吧。这是许多基督徒读这段经文的想法,所以我们都不敢把左脸给恶人,因为恶人变本加 利是有可能的。然而,如果我们认真的来想象,你用很羞辱的方式反手打人的右脸;被打的人反而拿左脸给你打,你会有什么反应?我想你的第一个反应应该是很吃 惊。反过来说你打了对方的左脸,对方还手,然后,你再还手,这样子的一来一往才是正常的情形。而你打对方左脸,他自己给你右脸打,你一定很吃惊,肯定预想 不到。

弟兄姐妹请放心,耶稣不是叫我们去给人家打脸。这里就跟“以眼还眼,以牙还牙”一样,是一种比喻。我们虽然不是盲目的跟着字面 上的解释,却和字面上的精神是一样的。耶稣叫我们如何回应恶人的行为,是非比寻常的,是超乎一般人想象的。耶稣的教导是恶人以恶待我们,我们反而以善待他 们,就好比我们让他们再打左脸一样,是跟报复完全相反的回应。使徒保罗在罗马书也有异曲同工的解说。

(罗12章17-21节) 17不要以恶报恶。众人以为美的事,要留心去做。 18若是能行,总要尽力与众人和睦。 19亲爱的弟兄,不要自己伸冤,宁可让步,听凭主怒(或作"让人发怒")。因为经上记着:"主说:'伸冤在我,我必报应。'" 20所以,"你的仇敌若饿了,就给他吃;若渴了,就给他喝。因为你这样行,就是把炭火堆在他的头上。" 21你不可为恶所胜,反要以善胜恶。

如 果我们以恶报恶,其实我们是为恶所胜,中了恶的圈套,如此我们只有增加这世上的恶,这绝对不是耶稣的国度的情景,这也不是律法原来要控制暴力的精神。报复 只有满足个人的私欲,而且会使到报仇者的本质变成了仇恨的本质,这绝对不是属灵的果子。耶稣要解决恶的方法就是以善胜恶。“你的仇敌若饿了,就给他吃;若 渴了,就给他喝。因为你这样行,就是把炭火堆在他的头上。”这是保罗引用箴言如何来对待仇敌的经文。把炭火堆在头上的一个解释就是悔改认错的表现。当我们 以善报恶的时候,更加吃亏的可能是必然的。不过,我们多走一里路的举动,也让对方有一个猛然反省的可能,提供给恶人一个悔改的机会。若能化敌为友,那是尽 善尽美的事。而众人以为美的事,要留心去做。“有求你的,就给他;有向你借贷的,不可推辞。”这当然不是指恶人。不过,这同样是与人和睦的原则,讲究的是 宽容慷慨的气度。每当我们行出天国里待人处事的爱的表现,我们不但自己领会神的子民的尊贵身份,我们也提醒主内弟兄姐妹我们都一同活在神的国度里面。

我 曾经听过一个见证,是禧年堂的弟兄姐妹。他跟另一位主内弟兄姐妹因为做生意上的事情,产生了误会,我们把他们称为A会友和B会友。后来,每逢B会友见到A 会友就给他脸色,对他的孩子也是一样。B会友虽然绝不是恶人,但主内弟兄姐妹若不能和睦彼此相爱,这是恶的彰显。如果A会友也来个“你做初一,我做十 五”,那这样的纠纷我想几十年都解决不了。象这样主内弟兄姐妹彼此之间几十年的不和,其实一点都不稀奇,这是很遗憾的事。不料A会友不肯善罢甘休,这果然 是上帝忌恶如仇的精神。他不愿意这样的景况持续下去,他决定继续不计较,不报复,以爱来回应。后来B会友有一宗丧事,A会友就去慰问帮忙。结果,他们化解 了误会,关系就恢复正常了。

听了这个见证,可能你觉得是在形容你。感谢主,其实教会就是神的国,化敌为友的事其实应该是习以为常的 事。人与人之间的误会和纠纷是难免的,但重要的是以善胜恶。但如果听了这个见证,你很向往这样的结局,可能是刚开始的误会或者几十年的恩怨情仇,那我们首 先就要停止报复,然后要以爱来回应。可能你会有“是他先惹我的,他应该先认错”的想法。可是,正如耶稣教导我们的拿右脸给人打一样,这本就是准备吃亏的念 头。为的是要以善胜恶。

我们以善胜恶的心态,其实还有更深一层的意义。就是耶稣的登山宝训是以“耶稣是王,这是神的国度” 为大前提。当我们活在神的国度里面,我们要降服在上帝的主权里面。保罗的书信就把他的意义讲明了:“不要自己伸冤,宁可让步,听凭主怒。因为经上记着: “主说:'伸冤在我,我必报应。'”我们之所以有仇不报,不是因为我们善恶不分。我们不自己来报复,那是因为我们清楚报复罪恶的是上帝,审判的主权在于上 帝。我们只管以爱对人,所有的不公平不公义由上帝来处理。这就是我们作为上帝国度的子民信念上的不同。

依此类推,如果我们是在世上带 有权柄,有实行公义的职份,可能你是审理案件的政府人员,可能是调节纷争的经理老板,我们也有义务赏善罚恶。以德报怨讲的是不可个人寻报私仇。可是若我们 是一位执行公正的人一定要秉公办理,这样行善的人才能有继续以善待人的信心,才不会以恶报恶,自行了断。就如足球场上的裁判,如果受害人还手或还头,都一 同被罚。若裁判赏罚分明,球员就不必自行报复。

所以保罗在罗马书13章3到4节继续说: 3作官的原不是叫行善的惧怕,乃是叫作恶的惧怕。你愿意不惧怕掌权的吗?你只要行善,就可得他的称赞。 4因为他是神的用人,是与你有益的。你若作恶,却当惧怕,因为他不是空空地佩剑。他是神的用人,是伸冤的,刑罚那作恶的。

所以我们知 道在世上作为执行公理的人,他们有秉公办理,赏善罚恶的任务。同样,我们也相信我们活在上帝的国度里面,神也是秉公办理,赏善罚恶,带来公平,因此我们对 人不要自行报复,而是凡事上以善待人,以德服人。也许听到这里你想这只是个理想,我们都不是圣人,达不到这个境界。的确,以善待人,以德报怨是不容易的事 情,去爱自己的仇敌并不是一件容易的事,可是正如上个星期长安牧师所讲的道,我们都是披上基督来活出属于神的新生命。所以力量不在于我们自己,是从耶稣基 督而来。

最后我要劝勉亲爱的弟兄姐妹,冤家宜解不宜结。我们都是领受恩典在主里新造的人。因此我们都有着使人和睦的呼召。我们所领受 的恩典都是神白白赐给我们的,就算我们在世人眼里看为愚拙,做了愚笨的事情,但我们能换来的是上帝的爱,那才是真正的智慧人。我深信如果我们每个人都能以 善胜恶,我们就能真正解决这世上的恶与仇恨,因为这是上帝自己要成就的事。愿上帝不断赐给我们属于他的爱,让我们也能彼此相爱,胜过一切的仇恨,把一切的 不公义都交托给他。

Wednesday, November 17, 2010

论不可有别的神 On Monotheism

弟 兄 姐 妹 平 安 。 今 天 的 经 文 取 自 申 命 记 5: 6-7。 “ 我 是 耶 和 华 你 的 神 , 曾 将 你 从 埃 及 地 , 为 奴 之 家 领 出 来 。 除 了 我 以 外 , 你 不 可 有 别 的 神 。 ” 今 天 的 经 文 , 就 是 十 诫 中 的 第 一 诫 。 虽 然 , 只 是 一 诫 , 但 因 为 是 第 一 诫 , 它 也 就 成 为 了 最 重 要 的 一 诫 。 这 一 诫 不 但 在 十 诫 之 中 居 首 位 , 其 他 九 诫 也 需 要 以 第 一 诫 为 主 轴 。 我 们 需 要 以 第 一 诫 为 中 心 思 想 , 来 明 白 接 下 来 的 九 诫 。 今 天 的 题 目 是 “ 唯 独 你 ” , 这 也 就 充 分 表 达 了 第 一 诫 的 中 心 思 想 : 唯 有 耶 和 华 才 是 你 的 神 。 这 一 诫 的 立 场 是 非 常 明 确 , 而 且 肯 定 的 。 在 这 里 , 耶 和 华 不 容 许 我 们 存 有 第 二 个 选 择 , 甚 至 连 次 等 的 神 也 不 可 以 接 受 。 耶 和 华 不 只 是 优 先 的 选 择 , 他 也 是 唯 一 的 选 择 。

这 样 的 想 法 也 许 我 们 一 时 也 不 容 易 接 受 。 毕 竟 我 们 人 喜 欢 有 选 择 的 自 由 , 我 们 喜 欢 新 鲜 感 。 如 果 , 每 天 都 给 你 穿 一 样 的 衣 服 , 吃 一 样 的 东 西 , 你 能 接 受 吗 ? 你 一 定 会 反 对 , 除 非 是 打 战 , 还 是 困 在 荒 岛 里 面 , 要 不 然 谁 愿 意 每 天 都 一 样 。 当 然 是 多 一 种 款 式 , 多 一 种 颜 色 的 衣 服 , 多 一 种 口 味 的 食 物 更 好 , 是 不 是 ? 而 且 , 这 里 所 说 的 , 不 只 是 琐 碎 的 事 情 , 而 是 在 说 生 命 的 主 权 的 事 情 , 选 择 只 给 你 一 个 , 这 样 的 条 件 怎 么 可 以 接 受 呢 ? 这 就 好 象 是 买 股 票 , 搞 投 资 一 样 。 买 的 种 类 越 多 , 投 资 的 范 围 越 大 , 风 险 就 越 小 , 是 不 是 ? 依 此 类 推 , 多 信 奉 一 个 神 , 多 一 分 保 障 , 多 一 种 保 佑 , 多 一 次 祝 福 , 不 是 吗 ? 如 果 单 单 相 信 耶 和 华 一 个 , 把 所 有 的 寄 托 都 放 在 同 一 个 希 望 , 风 险 又 大 , 又 没 有 新 鲜 感 , 耶 和 华 的 要 求 会 不 会 太 过 不 合 情 理 , 太 苛 刻 了 一 点 ?

如 果 我 今 天 为 了 迎 合 一 般 人 “ 怕 输 ” 的 心 态 , 跟 你 们 说 “ 没 有 啦 , 耶 和 华 哪 里 会 这 么 执 著 , 他 只 是 讲 讲 而 已 。 你 要 信 什 么 都 没 关 系 , 最 重 要 是 也 要 信 他 就 可 以 了 。 耶 和 华 保 证 你 上 天 堂 , 得 永 生 。 你 如 果 要 发 财 , 还 是 解 决 别 的 问 题 依 靠 别 的 神 也 可 以 。 ” 我 如 果 讲 这 样 的 话 , 我 就 是 在 欺 骗 你 。 这 样 的 话 不 单 与 耶 和 华 的 本 意 不 符 , 也 与 整 个 以 色 列 历 史 不 符 。 以 色 列 的 建 国 , 兴 衰 , 灭 国 , 与 依 靠 耶 和 华 为 唯 一 的 真 神 , 是 息 息 相 关 的 。 每 当 以 色 列 偏 离 耶 和 华 , 信 奉 别 的 神 , 耶 和 华 就 惩 罚 以 色 列 , 最 后 甚 至 使 他 们 灭 国 。 所 以 , 以 色 列 的 整 个 历 史 就 是 要 证 实 耶 和 华 才 是 他 们 唯 一 的 依 靠 , 耶 和 华 绝 不 容 许 在 以 色 列 里 面 第 二 个 神 的 存 在 。 所 以 , 耶 和 华 的 第 一 个 诫 命 , 是 认 真 的 , 是 坚 定 的 , 也 是 绝 对 的 。 如 果 说 这 第 一 个 诫 命 如 此 重 要 , 那 我 们 要 认 真 的 来 明 白 它 。 我 将 从 两 个 方 面 来 讲 解 第 一 诫 。

首 先 , 我 们 把 主 题 “ 唯 独 你 ” 的 焦 点 放 在 “ 你 ” 这 个 字 上 面 。 我 们 如 果 要 单 单 来 相 信 耶 和 华 , 那 就 要 认 清 谁 是 耶 和 华 。 所 以 , 今 天 的 主 题 的 第 一 点 就 是 “ 你 是 谁 , 是 谁 爱 你 ”(You are who loves you)。 这 也 就 是 说 谁 爱 你 , 也 就 确 定 了 你 的 身 份 。 这 个 道 理 很 简 单 , 意 义 却 很 深 长 。 先 有 爱 你 的 父 母 , 才 有 你 孩 子 的 身 份 。 先 有 爱 你 的 丈 夫 , 才 有 你 妻 子 的 身 份 。 先 有 爱 你 的 国 家 , 才 有 你 国 民 的 身 份 。 所 以 , 先 有 爱 你 的 神 , 才 有 你 信 徒 的 身 份 。 当 然 , 在 这 世 上 , 可 以 找 到 没 有 爱 的 父 母 , 没 有 爱 的 丈 夫 , 没 有 爱 的 国 家 , 让 某 些 人 对 孩 子 , 妻 子 , 国 民 的 身 份 模 糊 不 清 。 但 因 为 我 们 有 的 是 一 个 爱 的 上 帝 , 我 们 尊 贵 人 的 身 份 , 信 徒 的 身 份 , 就 因 此 显 明 出 来 了 。

耶 和 华 是 谁 呢 ? 他 如 何 爱 我 们 ? 我 们 从 经 文 可 以 看 到 , 耶 和 华 对 以 色 列 子 民 说 “ 我 是 耶 和 华 你 的 神 ” 。 耶 和 华 把 他 的 名 字 将 给 他 们 听 。 他 的 名 字 表 明 了 他 的 属 性 。 耶 和 华 的 名 字 , 代 表 了 他 的 永 恒 。 代 表 了 他 存 在 的 真 实 性 , 他 就 是 存 在 本 身 。 耶 和 华 的 名 字 代 表 了 创 造 , 因 为 他 不 存 在 , 万 物 也 都 不 存 在 。 耶 和 华 给 了 以 色 列 名 字 , 不 单 是 一 个 自 我 介 绍 , 更 是 一 个 自 我 启 示 。 一 个 神 给 了 一 群 人 他 的 名 字 , 不 但 显 露 了 他 的 存 在 , 也 显 明 了 他 跟 他 们 的 关 系 。 耶 和 华 的 名 , 也 带 有 前 瞻 性 的 盼 望 。 出 33: 19 耶 和 华 说 “ 我 要 显 我 一 切 的 恩 慈 , 在 你 面 前 经 过 , 宣 告 我 的 名 。 我 要 恩 待 谁 , 就 恩 待 谁 ; 要 怜 悯 谁 , 就 怜 悯 谁 。 ” 耶 和 华 的 名 字 包 含 了 过 去 , 现 在 , 永 远 , 他 的 作 为 就 是 他 的 本 性 。 他 的 属 性 , 就 是 他 在 存 在 里 面 的 作 为 。

不 单 如 此 , 耶 和 华 还 说 “ 我 是 你 的 神 ” 。 这 里 表 达 了 以 色 列 人 属 于 耶 和 华 , 同 时 也 耶 和 华 属 于 以 色 列 , 耶 和 华 选 择 做 他 们 的 神 。 这 个 事 情 一 点 也 不 简 单 。 因 为 耶 和 华 是 神 。 他 说 的 出 , 他 就 要 做 的 到 。 耶 和 华 既 然 人 以 色 列 为 子 民 , 耶 和 华 就 对 他 们 有 责 任 。 所 以 , 虽 然 我 们 不 是 以 色 列 人 , 我 们 不 是 直 接 的 对 象 。 可 是 , 我 们 却 能 间 接 体 会 耶 和 华 对 以 色 列 的 爱 。 爱 他 们 的 神 向 他 们 显 露 自 己 。 爱 他 们 的 神 向 他 们 提 出 建 立 关 系 的 承 诺 。 爱 他 们 的 神 向 他 们 立 约 。 因 为 耶 和 华 爱 以 色 列 , 以 色 列 从 此 就 不 再 一 样 。 以 色 列 人 得 到 了 耶 和 华 子 民 的 身 份 。 以 色 列 人 有 义 务 活 出 这 个 子 民 的 身 份 。

这 个 身 份 是 什 么 ? 耶 和 华 继 续 说 “ 我 曾 将 你 从 埃 及 地 , 为 奴 之 家 领 出 来 。 ” 在 这 里 我 们 可 以 看 到 , 耶 和 华 和 以 色 列 建 立 关 系 , 最 重 要 的 确 据 , 就 是 耶 和 华 曾 经 行 过 这 大 能 的 救 赎 。 因 为 耶 和 华 的 救 赎 , 以 色 列 人 从 奴 隶 变 成 了 自 由 的 人 。 奴 隶 是 工 具 , 奴 隶 没 有 选 择 的 自 由 , 奴 隶 没 有 发 挥 人 性 的 空 间 。 耶 和 华 的 拯 救 象 征 了 他 战 胜 埃 及 的 神 。 耶 和 华 把 自 由 给 了 原 是 奴 隶 的 以 色 列 人 。 所 以 , 耶 和 华 的 爱 , 给 了 以 色 列 人 自 由 人 的 身 份 。 这 样 的 子 民 有 自 由 来 敬 拜 上 帝 , 有 自 由 来 遵 行 神 的 道 , 有 自 由 来 表 达 对 上 帝 的 爱 。 很 可 惜 的 , 在 以 色 列 历 史 里 面 , 我 们 不 常 看 到 这 自 由 人 的 彰 显 。 以 色 列 人 在 旷 野 就 想 回 埃 及 做 奴 隶 。 士 师 时 代 就 做 迦 南 人 , 腓 力 士 人 的 奴 隶 。 君 王 时 代 , 就 成 为 亚 述 人 , 巴 比 伦 人 的 奴 隶 。 由 此 可 见 , 自 由 不 是 人 人 都 懂 得 如 何 接 受 使 用 。 不 过 , 经 文 的 重 点 就 是 让 我 们 看 到 , 耶 和 华 的 爱 是 救 赎 的 爱 。 因 为 耶 和 华 这 样 的 爱 以 色 列 人 , 以 色 列 人 子 民 的 身 份 , 就 是 一 个 自 由 子 民 的 身 份 。

这 些 话 虽 然 是 耶 和 华 对 以 色 列 说 的 , 但 对 我 们 非 以 色 列 人 意 义 也 是 一 样 。 耶 稣 也 给 了 我 们 同 样 的 启 示 。 他 不 但 给 了 我 们 名 字 , 还 道 成 肉 身 来 到 我 们 中 间 。 耶 稣 也 向 我 们 表 达 , 他 要 来 做 我 们 的 主 。 最 后 , 耶 稣 也 拯 救 我 们 脱 离 律 法 的 捆 绑 , 不 再 是 罪 的 奴 仆 。 因 此 , 耶 稣 对 我 们 的 爱 , 建 立 了 我 们 门 徒 的 身 份 。 我 们 有 一 位 可 以 认 识 的 主 , 他 已 经 邀 请 我 们 来 跟 从 他 , 并 且 他 的 死 里 复 活 是 我 们 脱 离死 亡 的 拯 救 。 我 们 要 活 出 这 个 尊 贵 门 徒 的 身 份 。 所 以 , 第 一 点 “ 我 是 谁 , 是 谁 爱 我 。 ” 爱 以 色 列 的 耶 和 华 使 以 色 列 人 成 为 一 个 能 自 由 爱 神 的 子 民 。 同 样 的 , 爱 我 们 的 耶 稣 使 我 们 成 为 一 个 能 自 由 爱 主 的 门 徒 。 我 们 门 徒 的 本 质 建 立 在 爱 我 们 的 基 础 上 。

不 过 , 今 天 的 主 题 “ 唯 独 你 ” 还 有 另 一 个 层 面 , 那 就 是 “ 唯 独 ” 两 个 字 的 重 要 性 。 所 以 , 耶 和 华 继 续 说 “ 除 了 我 以 外 , 你 不 可 有 别 的 神 。 ” 所 以 , 今 天 主 题 的 第 二 点 是 “ 你 是 谁 , 是 你 爱 谁 ” (you are who you love)。 意 思 就 是 说 , 你 选 择 爱 什 么 , 如 何 去 爱 , 你 就 成 为 什 么 身 份 。 这 第 二 个 道 理 也 很 简 单 , 意 义 也 是 很 深 长 。谁 爱 我 们 告 诉 我 们 , 我 们 的 身 份 能 够 是 什 么 。 可 是 , 我 们 如 何 去 爱 , 才 能 充 分 把 这 个 身 份 体 现 出 来 。 如 果 , 你 是 爱 父 母 , 孝 敬 父 母 的 人 , 你 就 有 孩 子 的 身 份 。 你 爱 丈 夫 , 你 就 显 出 妻 子 的 身 份 。 你 爱 国 家 , 你 就 是 国 民 的 身 份 。 谁 爱 你 , 只 是 关 系 的 基 础 , 但 是 你 爱 谁 , 才 是 关 系 的 彰 显 。 你 是 谁 , 是 你 爱 谁 。 我 们 不 能 选 择 谁 来 爱 我 们 。 可 是 , 我 们 可 以 选 择 要 来 爱 谁 。 我 们 只 要 能 够 看 出 一 个 人 爱 什 么 , 我 们 就 能 辨 认 这 个 是 一 个 什 么 样 的 人 , 他 所 能 彰 显 的 身 份 又 是 什 么 。 因 此 , 当 我 们 选 择 爱 神 的 时 候 , 我 们 信 徒 的 身 份 就 显 明 出 来 了 。

耶 和 华 要 的 爱 是 什 么 呢 ? 耶 和 华 清 楚 讲 明 , 他 要 的 爱 是 专 一 的 爱 。 这 个 爱 , 是 如 此 专 一 , 就 是 连 第 二 个 神 的 存 在 , 他 也 不 能 容 忍 。 以 色 列 如 果 要 活 出 以 色 列 子 民 的 身 份 , 就 要 对 耶 和 华 有 这 专 一 的 爱 。 这 容 易 做 到 吗 ? 不 容 易 。 一 点 也 不 容 易 。 以 色 列 人 是 活 在 一 个 多 神 , 多 宗 教 的 环 境 。 迦 南 人 的 神 巴 力 是 掌 管 丰 收 , 控 制 雨 水 的 神 。 如 果 , 你 是 耕 田 , 以 农 作 物 为 生 的 , 生 活 好 象 要 靠 他 。 巴 比 伦 的 神 是 暴 雨 神 。 如 果 你 是 渔 夫 , 时 常 出 海 , 生 活 好 象 要 靠 他 。 摩 亚 神 是 太 阳 神 , 管 公 义 的 , 你 有 冤 屈 好 象 要 靠 他 。 亚 们 神 是 死 神 , 约 旦 神 是 爱 神 , 没 有 他 们 , 死 后 怎 么 办 , 如 果 没 有 孩 子 , 那 又 怎 么 办 ? 所 以 , 耶 和 华 对 以 色 列 人 要 求 专 一 的 爱 , 是 不 容 易 做 到 的 。 以 色 列 人 若 只 信 奉 耶 和 华 , 就 是 把 饮 食 起 居 , 生 死 , 幸 福 , 完 全 交 脱 在 耶 和 华 手 里 。 耶 和 华 要 求 的 就 是 这 样 的 爱 。 以 色 列 人 需 要 完 全 的 依 靠 耶 和 华 , 也 唯 有 如 此 他 们 才 能 活 出 以 色 列 子 民 的 身 份 。

这 个 条 件 , 这 个 诫 命 听 起 来 好 象 不 合 情 理 , 可 是 却 是 会 带 来 最 大 的 祝 福 。 表 面 上 看 起 来 , 多 神 好 象 有 更 多 保 障 。 其 实 越 多 神 , 是 越 多 的 缠 绕 , 越 多 的 累 赘 。 且 不 说 这 些 神 是 真 神 假 神 , 你 能 担 保 你 能 安 抚 所 有 的 神 明 吗 ? 如 果 , 你 象 一 脚 踏 两 船 , 或 是 很 多 的 船 , 一 不 留 神 , 就 掉 进 水 里 了 。 你 想 靠 多 神 的 保 佑 , 结 果 你 什 么 神 都 要 害 怕 , 因 为 什 么 神 都 跟 你 有 关 系 , 什 么 神 都 可 以 影 响 你 的 生 命 。 相 反 的 , 如 果 我 们 只 敬 畏 耶 和 华 一 个 真 神 , 我 们 其 他 什 么 都 不 用 怕 , 因 为 不 管 是 什 么 他 都 可 以 摆 平 。 弟 兄 姐 妹 , 你 们 都 是 聪 明 人 , 是 什 么 都 怕 好 , 还 是 什 么 都 不 怕 , 唯 独 敬 畏 耶 和 华 好 ? 当 然 是 专 一 的 爱 耶 和 华 一 个 是 智 慧 的 选 择 。

所 以 , 耶 和 华 要 求 的 是 专 一 的 爱 。 也 许 , 你 会 觉 得 , 没 有 啊 , 我 没 有 拜 任 何 偶 像 , 我 只 有 基 督 教 一 个 宗 教 。 那 我 是 不 是 已 经 符 合 第 一 诫 呢 ? 在 这 里 我 们 要 小 心 。 爱 神 的 爱 , 和 普 通 心 里 的 爱 不 是 完 全 一 样 的 。 什 么 是 神 ? 神 就 是 能 在 你 的 生 命 里 面 掌 权 的 , 那 就 是 神 。 所 以 , 如 果 你 没 有 让 耶 和 华 在 你 生 命 里 面 掌 权 , 你 没 有 真 正 爱 神 。 相 反 的 , 如 果 你 让 别 的 人 , 或 东 西 在 你 生 命 里 面 掌 权 , 那 人 或 东 西 也 就 成 为 了 你 的 神 。 所 以 , 你 可 以 爱 家 , 爱 画 画 , 爱 某 一 个 明 星 , 甚 至 有 点 爱 钱 , 这 都 跟 爱 神 没 有 冲 突 。 但 如 果 任 何 一 样 , 成 为 了 可 以 左 右 你 的 生 命 的 影 响 力 。 你 把 你 生 命 的 主 权 交 给 他 , 他 就 成 为 了 你 第 二 个 神 。 这 个 是 耶 和 华 绝 对 不 容 许 的 。 生 命 的 主 权 只 有 一 个 , 那 就 是 耶 和 华 。 如 果 , 我 们 不 是 单 单 依 靠 耶 和 华 , 单 单 遵 行 他 的 旨 意 , 那 我 们 根 本 谈 不 上 爱 神 。 其 他 的 九 条 诫 命 , 也 更 难 遵 行 了 。 不 过 , 神 还 是 可 以 通 过 父 母 , 朋 友 , 书 籍 , 甚 至 钱 财 , 来 帮 助 我 们 生 活 , 这 些 不 是 和 耶 和 华 相 对 的 。 不 过 当 有 冲 突 的 时 候 , 我 们 需 要 辨 别 谁 才 是 我 们 的 神 , 谁 才 是 我 们 生 命 的 主 权 。 你 是 谁 , 是 你 爱 谁 。 你 如 果 爱 神 , 专 一 的 爱 神 , 你 就 是 彰 显 了 耶 和 华 子 民 的 身 份 。

如 何 来 爱 神 呢 ? 以 下 我 将 列 出 一 些 建 议 。 第 一 , 我 们 需 要 用 更 多 的 时 间 来 认 识 上 帝 。 如 果 , 我 们 说 我 们 爱 神 , 却 对 认 识 神 没 有 兴 趣 , 没 有 热 忱 , 那 我 们 是 在 自 相 矛 盾 。 所 以 , 我 们 一 定 要 花 时 间 读 经 , 花 时 间 参 加 圣 经 课 , 花 时 间 在 小 组 彼 此 讨 论 。 如 果 , 我 们 对 神 的 认 识 比 对 别 的 东 西 的 认 识 还 要 少 , 这 说 明 我 们 爱 别 的 东 西 比 爱 神 更 多 。 如 果 , 我 们 对 别 人 的 意 思 比 对 上 帝 的 旨 意 更 清 楚 , 那 什 么 才 是 我 们 心 目 中 的 上 帝 ? 当 我 们 读 经 , 研 究 , 讨 论 的 时 候 , 并 不 单 是 增 加 知 识 而 已 。 而 是 在 更 多 的 认 识 当 中 , 体 会 到 上 帝 对 我 们 的 爱 。 特 别 是 上 帝 嫉 妒 的 爱 。 人 的 嫉 妒 也 许 有 时 会 有 点 疯 狂 , 或 失 去 理 智 。 但 上 帝 的 上 帝 的 嫉 妒 是 合 理 , 并 且 应 该 的 , 因 为 上 帝 可 以 监 察 人 心 。 如 果 。 上 帝 不 在 乎 我 们 是 否 爱 他 比 什 么 都 更 多 , 上 帝 可 以 说 是 爱 我 们 吗 ? 不 可 以 。 上 帝 一 定 要 在 乎 , 一 定 要 会 嫉 妒 , 这 才 是 爱 。

第 二 , 我 们 需 要 警 惕 自 己 远 离 试 探 。 我 们 人 很 脆 弱 , 特 别 是 当 引 诱 来 临 的 时 候 , 我 们 很 容 易 被 吸 引 , 我 们 对 上 帝 的 爱 就 偏 离 了 。 什 么 引 诱 最 吸 引 我 们 呢 ? 那 就 是 可 以 给 我 们 权 力 的 东 西 。 偶 像 可 以 给 我 们 权 力 , 有 超 自 然 的 能 力 。 钱 可 以 给 我 们 权 力 , 有 屈 服 别 人 的 能 力 。 甚 至 科 技 , 知 识 也 可 以 给 我 们 权 力 , 因 为 这 些 可 以 给 我 们 战 胜 环 境 的 能 力 。 这 些 东 西 本 身 , 没 有 太 大 的 好 坏 之 分 , 但 如 果 我 们 过 于 信 赖 他 们 , 想 要 利 用 他 们 所 能 给 于 的 权 力 来 使 自 己 自 立 , 不 需 要 上 帝 , 这 些 东 西 就 成 为 了 我 们 的 第 二 个 神 。 弟 兄 姐 妹 , 我 们 现 在 是 自 由 人 , 我 们 要 把 自 由 放 在 对 得 主 权 上 面 。

第 三 , 我 们 要 常 常 祷 告 。 因 为 祷 告 使 我 们 警 醒 , 祷 告 使 我 们 与 神 交 通 , 更 多 认 识 他 。 祷 告 使 我 们 更 加 依 靠 耶 和 华 。 祷 告 是 我 们 守 第 一 诫 命 , 最 好 的 帮 助 。 我 来 为 今 天 的 主 题 作 最 后 的 总 结 。 你 是 谁 , 在 于 谁 爱 你 。 爱 你 的 是 拯 救 你 的 耶 和 华 , 他 给 于 你 的 是 一 个 可 以 自 由 选 择 爱 神 的 身 份 。 但 你 是 谁 , 也 在 于 你 爱 谁 。 我 们 要 用 我 们 的 自 由 专 一 的 爱 耶 和 华 。 我 们 要 花 时 间 读 经 , 祷 告 , 并 且 远 离 试 探 。 我 们 如 果 如 此 行 , 就 必 能 活 出 我 们 的 门 徒 , 信 徒 身 份 。 愿 神 祝 福 大 家 。

Friday, November 12, 2010

On Christian Unity

A sermon on John 17:20-26

In today’s passage, we have come to the final section of Jesus’ high priestly prayer to the Holy Father. As we have heard from the sermon last week, in the final section, Jesus changed his focus from the disciples to pray about the Church that will be formed in the future. This passage is therefore evermore important, because it is about us, that Jesus prayed for before his arrest and imminent death. This is about us, it is personal. This prayer is an intercessory prayer for you as it is also for me. We must understand and appreciate for ourselves what is the matter that Jesus is the most concerned about us, the future believers. Such is the gravity of today’s topic, for it is Jesus’ primary prayer to God about us. So, today’s sermon is less of a teaching, and more of a heart to heart sharing. For we acknowledge that through Jesus, God becomes a personal God to us. If today’s matter is of the biggest concern to Jesus, such that he plead to God about it, before his death, shouldn’t it be our biggest concern as well? And if we care not for this matter, are we say we love Jesus? If we do not commit ourselves into this matter, are we not breaking Jesus’ heart? This matter that I want to share with you today is on Christian Unity.

The first time I heard about this passage is when I was doing a video shoot for the Presbyterian Synod. During an interview with our Synod Moderator Rev HH, he shared about his work and the projects that are going on in the Presbyterian Synod. As always, I conclude the interview with a customary question, which is “if there is one thing you will like to share with all the members of the Presbyterian churches, what would it be?” What followed is a moment I have reflected upon to this day. The ever cheerful man grew silent, then he replied with a warm prayerful voice. “Learning to be thankful for being part of the Presbyterian churches in Singapore is a very important affirmation. The other is the ability to extend ourselves to come alongside each other. I am constantly reminded of a prayer of Jesus Christ in the Gospel of Jesus chapter 17, that he prayed that the church be one, the disciples be one, even as the God the Father and himself are one. So that it be a witness to the whole world, so that people will be drawn to Jesus, because of this unity in him, and for him.”

This prayer of Jesus is a constant reminder for Rev HH. For him, if he were to share with you on one matter. It is not to ask you to sacrifice for the church, or to give money or to remember to do your QT. It is a gentle invitation to be one in the body of Christ. Upon my reflection, this matter is just as important today, as it is in the days of the apostles’ John’s Church, when they were facing persecution and heresy. If Jesus were with us today, would he say that we are united as one? Let’s make an honest assessment of the Presbyterian Church of Singapore. How many of us here know what the Synod is doing? How many of us are concerned about news of the other churches? Can you even name the names of 10 Presbyterian churches? I am not criticizing anybody today. But I just want to emphasize the reality of there is so much more we can do.

If we widen the scope and look at the churches of Singapore, are we united as one? It is time of some soul searching when there are churches with grand buildings paid for in a year, and others renting places and struggling with financial difficulties. And if we widen the scope further to include church all over the world, we can witness the charismatic vs. the conservatives, the fundamentalists vs. the liberals, and Catholics vs. the Protestants. In the Creed, we profess that we are one, holy, Catholic Church. When I hear some of the things Christians say about other churches, it is hard to believe the Church is one.

And if we narrow the scope to Jubilee Church itself, can we say that we are united as one? Do we know members of both services, do you know what the youth, the children, the elderly is doing every week? Even, among the cell groups of the Chinese service, how often do we dialogue with one another besides the leaders and pastors? Actually, as a pastor myself, I do know of many good things happening, so there is no need to be defensive. But, in my position, it has also allowed me to see the many areas we can work on and persevere. So, today’s topic on Christian unity, is not just the work of the pastors and the Church leaders. It is the work of everybody. We only need one person neglected, for one to become two. Let us all work together on Christian unity for it is Christ’s number one concern for us. Not only just Jubilee Church, but also with the Presbyterian Church of Singapore, with the national Council of Churches in Singapore, and with all the denominations worldwide. Even though, the work is immense, but I believe the task is possible. For this prayer of Jesus is not a plead to us, mere human. It is to God the Father. And He who is faithful will bind us all together. It is with great hope that I exhort you in this matter. For is not the work of salvation itself a work of reconciliation.

Today’s passage sheds light of the unity that we can have in three ways. Firstly, Unity in Word. We the church is gathered as one because of one common reason. That we believe in Jesus because of the words of the disciples. The word here refers to the Gospel. We may all have come from different backgrounds, we may have different culture, different passion in life. But the moment when we are called into the assembly of God’s people, we have become one. The faith in Jesus is our identity; Jesus becomes our common ground. But we do not only have a common past in Jesus, we have a common future in Jesus. Our conversion experience may differ, but we all await the same Second Coming. Not only that, Jesus unites us in our present for we are all given the common mission. This is the word that was given to us, that we have come to believe. This word of the disciples was passed down from one to another. Those who heard and believe passed it on. And on, and on, and on. Rev. Tom Wright says “The Church is never more than one generation away from extinction; all it take is for a single generation not to hand the word on.” We are bound together to make sure this word passes on to the next generation. The word is our common mission, it is our common goal. The church filled with conflict may do well to be reminded of a general who, coming on deck and finding two naval officers quarreling, turned them around and – pointing to the ships of their adversary – exclaimed, “ Gentlemen, there are your enemies!” That is right. We live in a world in darkness, and we have to fulfill this mission together. And this is the unity that we have and must cherish: the Unity in Word.

Secondly, Unity in Divinity. Our union is not only because of something we all share, but also because of the union between the Father and the Son. Last week, Pastor Daniel shared that the Father and the Son is an ontological union, two person, but one God. We will never fully comprehend this divine union, nor can our Christian union ever achieve such ontological unity. But, it is yet such a union that our Christian union is modeled after, such that it makes our Christian union itself divine. The reality of our union is not just an arrangement like putting together a class or a couple being matchmaked. Just as the father is in the Son, and the Son in the Father, we live within that unity. In living in the unity between the father and the son, the father can now be in us, and we can be in the father. Furthermore, Jesus says, “I want them to see my glory, the glory which you’ve given me.” This glory that Jesus is talking about, is the glory of him seating on the throne on the right side of the Father, high and exalted. The exalted high Lamb worthy of all praise and honor. How will we see this glory? We shall be the ones described in Revelations 7:9 onwards. The great multitude that no one could count, from every nation, tribe, people and language, standing before the throne and in front of the Lamb. V15 They are before the throne of God and serve him day and night in his temple: and he who sits on the throne will spread his tent over them. V17 For the Lamb at the center of the throne will be their shepherd, he will lead them to springs of living water, and God will wipe away every tear from their eyes. In the words of Bonhoeffer, to be united divinely means this “we who live in fellowship with Jesus will one day be with him in eternal fellowship. He who looks upon his brother should know that he will be eternally united with him in Jesus Christ. Our community with oe another consists solely in what Christ has done to both of us. This is true not merely at the beginning, it remains so for all future and to all eternity.” Our unity is in Jesus, and we shall see his glory in eternity. Such is the unity we have, a divine unity.

So firstly, it is Unity in Word, which is our common foundation and our common mission. Secondly it is Unity in Divinity, which brings out the reality of our union, both now and in future. Thirdly, Unity in Love. This unity we have, just like any human relationship cannot be forced. There can be no bullying, no manipulation. We are called into this unity to love one another. It is true that even true brother and sisters in blood may quarrel and conflict with one another. But as spiritual brothers and sisters, we have no excuse not to work afresh in every generation towards this unity that Jesus pray for. If we are, essentially, one in faith, there can be no final reason why we may not be one, also, in out life and worship. Sometimes, I think of Christian unity like a harmony of a choir. Those I often try to harmonise with the rest, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak, I can’t help but be off-key. But remember today, that it is not by our efforts that this unity is possible. It is not true human love that we show for each other, temporal and shallow. It is with the love of God that we give to one another, eternal and deep. This love of God is the love that God the Father has for his only Son. The love with which the Father loves the Son will be in us, and with this love we will love one another and unite one another. Because we are loving one another with the love of the Father, we know that that is a self-sacrificing love. Therefore, we have to commit ourselves into loving service to one another, one that goes beyond the needs of oneself, one that is self-sacrificing. For God so love the world that he has given his only begotten son, what more we should give to one another. Such is unity in love. We can make beautiful music together.

If we manifest our unity in this three ways, in Word, in divinity and in love, the world will see and know that this is the work of God. This kind of community united across all traditional barriers of race, custom, gender or class, can only come from the action of the creator God. The world will see and believe. May our community be like the rainbow, that though we come in many colors, we are so well blend, so beautiful, it must be the work of the Creator. And when the colors unite as one, we become the light of the world that shines forth into all darkness. This is not a dream but a reality, for this is the prayer of Jesus to the Father. And what God put together let no man put asunder. Let us all remember this important wise saying: “The world at its worst needs the church at its best.”

I shall conclude with a funny story. A visitor to a mental hospital was astonished to note that there were only three guards watching over a hundred dangerous inmates. He asked his guide, “Don’t you fear that these people will overpower the guards and escape?” “No”, was the reply. “Lunatics never unite.’ Yes, brothers and sisters. The Christian walk is a long and difficult path. We will be crazy not to be united. Let’s pray.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

On Time and Timing

A sermon on John 16

Some time ago, there was a very popular beer advertisement. It is about Tiger Beer, and the tagline is “What Time is it?” The advertisement is always accompanied with images of partying, having fun, celebration time and even more partying. Along with the tagline “What Time is it?” the advertisement answers “It’s Tiger time.” The aim of the advertisement is obvious. It is to say that in times of fun, partying, and having a good time with friends, it is also time to drink Tiger beer. In the advertisements, you will not find images of crying, or mourning or depression. It is not to say that one does not drink beer at such times. Surely you have heard of the expression “drowning your sorrows”. But simply put, Tiger beer would not want to associate themselves with unhappiness or sorrow or when bad things happen. Tiger time is good times. So when the tagline goes “What time is it?” it is to ask, are you having a good time? More importantly, it is asking you, “are you drinking Tiger beer?” Tiger time is good times.

I guess it is natural for people to desire good times, rather than bad times. This is true not just for business or advertisers but also for most of us. It would be strange for one to prefer pain and suffering over laughter and joy. This is understandable, and this mentality often translates into our prayers and our decisions in life. We ask God for good things to happen to us, and we hope that our decisions enable good outcomes. It is also why we have difficulty comprehending sufferings and how bad things can happen to good people. Don’t you wish that all times were good times? Indeed, I have many sleepless moments wrestling with God as to the meaning of the world that he has created. This is the issue we want to look into today. The idea of good times and bad times, and at its very essence, the concept of time itself.

For ages, man have struggled with the concept of time. I did a little research on the Net and found a 50 page summary on the philosophy of time. 50 page summary to properly define time! I will not bore you with the details, but I will need to share some basic concepts later in the sermon that is relevant to today’s topic. The point for now is this, man is both mystified and perplexed by time. Ecclesiastes 3:11 “He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men; yet they cannot fathom what God has done from beginning to end.” We have been given the concept of eternity, and its causes us to yearn towards matters beyond our basic existence. However, our limitation as a human being causes us to be frustrated at things that do not make sense that happen at a given time. Hence we can see that time both allows us to look beyond ourselves, and at the same time bind us to the current reality. Therefore, we have to seriously address the issue of time, and our understanding of it will not only alleviate our current vexation with the world, it would also transform our Christian living to a higher plane. I will cover this in three areas.

Firstly, Jesus told his disciples “In a little while you will see me no more, and then after a little while you will see me.” His disciples are then confused as to what he mean by the two instances of “a little while”. Jesus then clarifies that in the first instance of “a little while”, it would be the time for his death. There will be much grieving for his disciples, though for those who are evil, they will be happy to be rid of him. Yet there will come a second instance of “a little while”, it is would be the time of his resurrection. This will be the time of joy for the disciples, and indeed, it is joy that no one will take away. To explain the relationship of the two “a little while” and their significance, Jesus used the analogy of a pregnant woman giving birth. Her time of labor is her time of pain because that is the time the baby is coming out. But when the baby is born into the world, it is no longer the time of pain, but the time of joy for the birth of a baby.

This analogy of the pregnant woman is a common one in Jewish literature. Isaiah 66:7-11, “Before she goes into labor, she gives birth; before the pains come upon her, she delivers a son. Who has ever heard of such a thing? Who has ever seen such things? Can country be born in a day or a nation be brought forth in a moment? Yet no sooner is Zion in labor than she gives birth to her children. Do I bring to the moment of birth and not give delivery? Says the Lord. Do I close up the womb when I bring to delivery? Says your God. Rejoice with Jerusalem and be glad for her, all you who love her; rejoice greatly with her all you who mourn over her. For you will nurse and be satisfied at her comforting breasts, you will drink deeply and delight in her overflowing abundance.”

The Isaiah passage shows that the restoration of Israel is like the birth of a child. And when that day comes, God will bring about smooth delivery, just as God will bring about the restoration of Israel into completion. Based on Jesus’ analogy, we can now understand the restoration of Israel as the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. At Jesus death, the disciples may feel pain and grief. But Isaiah’s prophecy reveals that God will deliver the baby, and the people of the new nation will be borne. This is the resurrection of Jesus.

So we understand the significance of Jesus’ death and resurrection. It is to bring about the birth of a new Israel. But the analogy of the pregnant woman also shows us the relationship between the two instances of “a little while.” A woman cannot give birth without the pain of labor. The pain of labor must bring forth the birth of a child. Though each event happens in its own time, both are closely related. In the same way, Jesus’ resurrection cannot happen without Jesus’ death, and Jesus’ death brings forth the reality of Jesus’ resurrection. For Jesus, his death is a certainty in time, just as his resurrection is also a certainty in time. The occurrence of these two events is a predetermined reality in God’s time. In the Gospel of John, Jesus is not only the historical Jesus but also the exalted Christ in heaven. Hence, Jesus transcends time to speak of his imminent death and resurrection. His aim is so that his disciples would be comforted in their times of grief during his death.

Therefore Jesus tells his disciples that their grief will only be for a little while, and at his resurrection, all their grief will turn into joy. Their suffering and grieving is a certainty in time because of his death, but precisely because of his death, they will experience great joy because they will witness his resurrection. This joy, nobody can take away because the resurrection of Jesus is eternal. In their time of grief they must persist and hold on to their faith, because just as his death is real, his resurrection is real, and their time of everlasting joy will come. The joy of a baby far outweighs the pain of labor. In the same sense, this joy the disciples experience will far outweigh the grief they have of his death.

Ironically, the best way to appreciate this joy is to appreciate the depth of the grief that death brings. Think about the pain you experience when you lose a loved one. Think about the pain of parting. There is no sorrow greater than this. Yet such is the joy of resurrection that you will forget about the grief that was so strong and hurting before. If the pain of death is deep, the joy of resurrection is truly beyond measure. How can this joy be so powerful? Because just as death signals the temporal parting, resurrection implies the everlasting union the disciples can have with Jesus. Hence this joy of resurrection is important for the Christian faith and must be experience by every believer. It also brings me to my second point, which is this joy must be complete.

How do we make this joy compete? Jesus says “In that day you will no longer ask me anything. I tell you the truth, my Father will give you whatever you ask in my name. Until now, you have not asked me anything in my name. Ask and you will receive, and your joy will be complete.’ So to make this joy of resurrection complete, we must ask God in Jesus name and receive. Jesus states that in that day, which is the time of resurrection, you will no longer ask me anything. This mean that it will be the moment of truth, and all the purpose of his coming on earth will be unveiled. The disciples will have no more questions and doubts. This is indeed the moment we all have been hoping for. The day when we live in such joy, there is no more questions. All questioning grows silent, and nothing needs explanation. Such is the experience of living in such joy. What this also implies that when the disciples witness the resurrection of Jesus Christ, they will know exactly what to ask of God in Jesus name.

What is it that they must ask of God, and what does it mean to ask it in Jesus name? This is the fundamental question as it is what we will receive that will make our joy of Jesus’ resurrection complete. To ask in Jesus name is to ask in the full power of God’s own name. John 17:11-12, In Jesus’ prayer, “Holy Father, protect them by the power of your name – the name you gave me – so that they may be one as we are one. While I was with them, I protected them and kept them safe by that name you gave me.” Hence Jesus’ name is God’s name. It represents divine authority and power.

There are three ways to understand what would the disciples would ask of God, and they are all inter-related. Firstly, they could ask of the New Kingdom of Israel. The death and resurrection implies the end of Israel’s wait and the beginning of the New Kingdom. All prayer will focus on the development of this kingdom. Secondly, they could pray that this new kingdom, the church, be one with Christ, just as The Father and Son is one. This is indicated in the verse from John 17. Thirdly, with the imminent departure of Christ, the disciples would be praying for the coming of the Spirit. And this is based on the prayer on the upper room by the disciples after the accession, and the Pentecost event. Ultimately, they all mean the same thing, as prayer for the new Kingdom is prayer for the church, and for the church to be one and protected from evil, it is the work of the Spirit; and the chief work of the Spirit is the empowerment of the church for the growth of the God’s Kingdom.

Finally, what does all these mean for the Christians of today? In my first point, I have shown you how Jesus tell the disciples of the reality of the two instances of “a little while”. They speak of the certainty of his death and resurrection. Because of this certainty, they will experience grief, but will then be overcome with joy. In my second point, I expressed that to make this joy complete, the disciples will have to pray for the kingdom of God, the Church of Christ, and the coming of the Spirit. How is Jesus able to speak of all this? Because he understood the meaning of time.

For every time, there is a space. And for every timespace, there is an event. The timespace for the past is as real as the present as it is for the future. Jesus understands that the time for his death must happen, just as there is the time for his resurrection. There is a time for the disciples to grief, but there must also come the time for the disciples to rejoice. And when the time of rejoicing come, it is the time for them to ask of the new kingdom and the coming of the Spirit. Today, we too must understand the meaning of time. We must see that God has prepared a timespace for every event, and just as the past has happened, the future must happen. We may not understand the meaning of every event that is happening now, but we need to be affirmed that all that is happening is set in time. And just as the bad times shall past, the good times promised by God must come. And be it the bad times of the good times, it is our time to respond and to act in God’s will. There is the time to grief, and God allows such times. But we too must accept such times, as we await the time to rejoice. Do not be frustrated by the times where you mourn while the evil rejoices. For when the time of rejoicing comes, it is a joy that is far-exceeding, and one that nobody can take away.

It is natural to always hope for good times. But life is planned by God for everybody such that they will have their potions of sorrow and their potions of joy. Just as it is a certainty for Jesus to face death to achieve resurrection, we too must go through patches of death for resurrection to come. There are times of anguish where we allow our old selves to die for the new self to be reborn. There are times of grieving when we part with our old ways to pursue a new path. There are times of pain when we separate from our comfort zone to join a new family. We may not understand when bad times come, just as the disciples do not understand why Christ must die. But be patient when these times come, and persevere my brothers and sisters. For Christ has resurrected and so must we. We are now no longer in doubt or fear for we have witness the resurrection of Christ. In him, in the due time of God, is the certainty of our salvation. Pray for the regeneration of the Spirit, pray for the kingdom of God, and pray for the unity of the Church. Ask and you shall receive, and your joy will be complete. May God bless each one of your with the abundant grace of his time.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

On Lying

This is a topical sermon on Lying

Today’s passage is taken from Deuteronomy 5:20 “You shall not give false testimony against your neighbor.” It is continues from our sermon series on the Ten commandments and this is the ninth commandment. This commandment, just like the rest, is an important one because of 2 main factors. Firstly, it reveals to us the nature of God. And that is the “why” part of the commandment. Secondly, it tells us how to live our lives on earth. And that is the “how to” part of the commandment. I will be sharing on the background of the commandment, followed by its theological backing, then I will share about its limitations, and I’ll end off with the modern applications.

Base on the text about “giving false testimony”, we can immediately infer a judicial or legal setting for this commandment. Indeed, this is the primary objective of the commandment. Commandment 6 states that “Thou shall not murder”. Commandment 7 states that “Thou shall not commit adultery”. Commandment 8 is “Thou shall not steal”. These are all grievous sins, and if one is found guilty, the punishment is going to be harsh, or even amounting to death. The same can also be said on the earlier commandments about idolatry and blasphemy. We can recall that even in New Testament times, it is death penalty for those found guilty of such sins. Because of the severity of the charges, one needs a proper legal system to ensure that no one is unduly punished, because once the punishment is dealt, most of them are irreversible. And the way to administer justice in such matters, which is not unlike modern times, is to use witnesses. Therefore, the maintenance of justice was dependent on the reliability of the witness.

Read: Deuteronomy 17:2-7 So we see that at least 2 witnesses are needed to put a guilty person to death, and the witnesses must be the first to deal out the punishment. In this case, they must cast the first stones on the guilty person. If you are not convinced on the person’s sins, I don’t think there are many who can really do it. In a way, if the person is innocent, the blood will be on the witnesses’ hands. To make sure that such a system is not abused, investigation is also made on the witness, like the modern day cross-examination by lawyers.

Read: Deuteronomy 19:15-21 Here we can see that the penalty for a false testimony is the same as the penalty dealt if the accused is found guilty. “Show no pity: life for life, eye for eye, tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot.” If the witness accuses somebody of a sin worthy of death penalty and later found by the judges to be lying, the false witness would be dealt the death penalty instead. Therefore, we can see that the matter of being a witness is no light matter.

Besides matters of sins and punishments, witnesses are also involved in hearing testimony and signing commercial or civil documents. Witnesses serve an essential purpose in verifying business transactions, such as sale of property, marriages and changes in social status.

Therefore, the ninth commandment sustains the validity of the first eight commandments. Without this commandment, the first eight commandments cannot be executed without abuse. Furthermore, the ninth commandment is vital in sustaining all human interactions so that property ownership is valid and marriages are verified and authenticity can be confirmed. Such legal systems rely heavily on the dependability of the witnesses and hence a trustworthy person has a good name and reputation. And that reputation is worthier than riches or gold.

But the purpose of the ninth commandment is not merely functional so that the social fabric can stay intact. The commandment also encompasses the broader issues of honesty, and faithfulness to one’s word. The issue is not just legal transactions but it also includes the nature of a lie and the place of a liar before the eyes of God. The theological underpinning behind the commandment is that falsehood itself is against the essence of God who is the eternal Truth. God is Truth, and a lie is against the nature of God.

Read Proverbs 6:16-19 Here we see that out of the seven detestable things, two involves falsehood: a lying tongue and a false witness who pours out lies. God hates liars because their lies harm their victims, but more so because lies are evil and God’s words are intended for good.

Read Jeremiah 9:3-9 Here we see that God judge against Judah because it had become a nation of liars. When lies and liars prevail in the society, there can be no trust, and no person is real, and they have to live by deception. Such a people are totally against God’s will, which is based on trust and faith. The community must be open and authentic. And the way of living should be dependence on God and hard work, instead of relying on one’s craftiness.

In this way, falsehood is not just against the essence of God; it is also against the essence of what it means to be a Man. To be a true man is live within a covenant relationship with God. A covenant cannot be built on deception but rather on trust and faithfulness. A lie would cast doubts into the expectation that truth be told. We cannot depend on a person who cannot keep or honor his word. Therefore a liar cannot remain in the covenant of God because the relationship is broken by the lack of trust. A liar ultimately deceives himself because he believes that the lie can be dependable, and more so than depending on honesty with God. A liar inherently means that he do not acknowledge God nor his justice.

Brothers and sisters, the ninth commandment reveals to us the nature of God. God is Truth, and God is the measure and standard of all truths. To indulge in lies and deception, would mean that we purposefully go against the nature and will of God and that road will lead to judgement. The ninth commandment also reveals that God is faithfulness, and he will honor his covenant with us, and what he promises, he will fulfil. If we rely on lies and deception for our living, we break this covenant and we no longer live in his will, and our being become a forgery of our own making.

But, you might question me, does it mean that we MUST tell the truth all the time? Can a Christian never lie? According to some famous theologians like Augustine, Thomas Aquinas and Immanuel Kant, this is so. They believe that truth must be maintained at all times, and lies can never be good. Even if lying seems like the right thing for the moment, the ultimate effect will be bad because a lie has been told. I am however more pastoral at heart, and will share with you some Jewish wisdom that will perhaps make your living a little easier.

Jewish teaching indicate that there are 5 situations where one is permitted or sometimes required to lie:
1. Lying to Preserve the Cause of Peace or in Order Not to Hurt Another Person’s Feelings The Ritva (Rabbi Yomtov ben Abraham), states in an unambiguous manner that wherever one has to be concerned about "the ways of peace" there is no prohibition of "Distance yourself from a false matter." This would probably include such statements as "you look good," "nice to see you," "thanks for the wonderful gift," "I really had a wonderful time," "You haven’t aged a bit," or "I missed you." Being told by friends that "You look terrible," "I couldn’t care less whether I saw you," "I hate your gift," "I had a lousy time," "Boy, did you age," or "I did not miss you at all" would not further the cause of peace. From the story of Abraham and Sarah in Genesis 18:10-13. When Sarah overheard one of the three "guests" telling Abraham that she would have a son by the following year she laughed and said to herself that her husband was old. God gets angry and asks Abraham why Sarah laughed in disbelief saying she was old, i.e., too old to have children. Seemingly, God altered the truth in order to spare Abraham’s feelings.

2. Lying in A Situation Where Honesty Might Cause Oneself or Another Person Physical Harm The two midwives in Egypt, Shifra and Puah, undoubtedly did the right thing by lying to Pharaoh and thereby not take part in the attempt to murder newborns. There is no question that Jewish law obligates one to prevaricate in order to save one’s own life or the life of another person. Rahab the harlot prevaricated in order to save the life of the two Jewish spies sent by Joshua to Jericho (see Joshua 2). The Midrash (Pirka D’Rabeinu Hakodosh 15) notes that Rahab told a lie yet inherited life in this world and in the world to come. In fact, eight prophets descended from her (Babylonian Talmud, Megilla 14b). So if lives are at stake, there is no reason not to evade stating the truth so that harm will not come to the innocent.

3. Lying for the Sake Of Modesty or in Order Not to Appear Arrogant Judaism also commands the converse of the above insofar as one is obligated to ensure that he does not benefit from others’ misconception about his status or scholarship. The Talmud (Jerusalem Talmud, Maakot 2:6) states that if one is being honored by the public as a scholar who is proficient in two tractates but only knows one, he is obligated to disabuse the misconception and explicitly state "I am only knowledgeable in one tractate, and no more." So if someone knows you are very good with the Bible, and says “John is the best in his New Testament.” You are not to say “my new Testament is good, but my old Testament is better.” Even though that may be the truth.

4. Lying for the Sake of Decency One may lie if he was asked whether or not he slept in a particular bed. The bed may be stained from an emission and this could be embarrassing. In modern context, if you heard a lady passing gas beside you, and somebody ask “Why is it so smelly?” You are not to state the truth for the sake of decency. The gentlemanly thing to do is to say “I did it, I apologize” even though it may be a lie. So now you know that some men who seem to pass gas a lot may not be the truth. They may just be very loving husbands.

5. Lying to Protect One’s Property From Scoundrels The fifth case (Babylonian Talmud, Nedarim 27b) describes where lies to thieves are permitted in order to protect oneself from financial harm. One is permitted to make a vow to murderers, plunderers, and [corrupt] tax collectors that the produce they wish to seize is terumah [which is only permitted to be eaten by priests and therefore of little value; an alternative explanation is that even murderers and robbers would not violate the prohibition against using terumah], even if it is not terumah, or that the property they wish to seize belongs to the Royal House, even if it does not. We have a situation where one is dealing with immoral people and the victim has no other recourse. The victim has no obligation to tell the scoundrels the truth about one’s property to protect oneself.

6. Habitual Lying Dratch (1988) claims that even when prevaricating is permissible, habitual lying will still be forbidden. Story: Rav was constantly tormented by his wife. When he asked her to prepare him some lentils, she would prepare peas. When he asked for peas, she would prepare lentils. When Chiya, Rav’s son, grew up, he would reverse his father’s request. Once, Rav said to Chiya: "Your mother has improved." Rabbi Chiya replied: "It is I who reversed your requests to her." Rav remarked to Chiya: "This is what people say, ‘Your own offspring teaches you reason.’" However, you should not continue to do so, for it says (Jeremiah 9:4): "They have taught their tongues to speak lies."

Therefore, though it may seem permissible from the above cases to lie, it is generally discouraged in case the lying may become habitual. As Christians, we make decisions, including decisions about our words, not simply as rule-keepers, but as people disposed to truthfulness. Hence we must be prepared to regret even the justifiable lie as a mark that we are “not yet fully in the Spirit of Truth”. In this broken world, sometimes a lie is justifiable. But we should remember that every lie, even the justifiable ones, is a sad reminder of our brokenness.

The five situations demonstrate that Jewish law does not take an absolutist approach to evading the truth and, indeed, will obligate the individual to lie in various circumstances, for instance, lying to save a life or to bring peace. This, by no means, makes light of the seriousness of lying. The bible is very clear that God hates liars. The extreme importance of honesty is appropriately summed up by the Jewish belief that the first question a person is asked in the hereafter at the final judgment is (Babylonian Talmud, Shabbat 31a): "Have you been honest in your dealings?” That should be a fair warning to us all not to abuse the examples that I have listed. The examples are meant as a guide as to when we must be careful in telling the truth, and not just follow the commandment blindly.

Lastly, I wish to state that it is not enough that we refrain from telling lies. In this day and age where marketing and publicity prevails, we must be advocates of truth. I shall list down some areas that we should work towards, in making the world more in line with the will of God. Our response to today’s world is to work on ourselves, our households and our communities. One of the first priorities is human relationships and the quality of our community life together. We can pursue critical thinking and discernment in the company of others. We can help each other clarify and communicate with each other. Weaknesses in my knowledge and skills are compensated by your strengths, and vice versa.

Today, I wish to focus on 3 key areas that we can all work towards to change ourselves, our family, our environment and eventually, impacting the world. Firstly, we live in a society of gossip. Major publications like newspapers, magazines and entertainment news on TV feature celebrity gossip to appeal to people’s curiosity. Just imagine how much ordinary conversation among people would be left if we removed talk about the weather and gossip about others? God has given every person in the world a true being and a reality. When we gossip, or promote gossip, we are taking this right away and making others believe in a fake reality of the person.

The only justifiable reason for passing information of a personal nature about others is that doing so promises to help those people. If sharing information about others leads to more prayer or more care, then it is probably legitimate. Still, we must be sure that what we pass on is true, and that means we must interact with the person concerned. We must always remember, as stated earlier, that even if something is true, it may not be right to share it with others. It is worse to speculate on people’s actions, tastes, relationships and attitudes. It is bad enough to think about such things in a negative way. We anger God when we pass on such speculations to others, for gossip can destroy lives.

What are some of the practical steps to take to avoid spreading untruths? To start, when someone wants to share gossip with you, cut the person off and say “I don’t think we should be talking about this person behind his/her back.” When someone pries and probes for your information about someone else, decline to say anything. Try to lessen your reading about celebrity gossips or entertainment news of a gossip nature. This is setting a good example.

If someone has a problem, we should speak about it to God in prayer and speak to that person directly. We must be slow to speak and to condemn or judge and quick to listen. We must speak the truth in love. That means that it is in a way that helps and builds up the person. Or else, we should at least keep quiet.

Secondly, we must avoid a very common form of false witnessing, and that is stereotyping. Just like gossips, when we stereotype people, we are replacing a living reality with an image that is unfair and misleading. When we hear them, we must protest and immediately introduce evidence to undermine the power of the stereotype. The media or hate groups introduce many of the stereotyping, and we must learn to reject them.

An example is that of women drivers. I know there is a negative stereotyping of women drivers. I have even heard of women drivers complaining about women drivers. If treated lightly, it is spread like a joke. But if it is ingrained into our mindset, it can promote impatience with female drivers, and even lead to accidents. This is only a small matter compared to other stereotypes that can lead to racism or gender oppression. But stereotyping whether big or small is promoting a false image of an actual reality, and that is giving a false witness. The next time somebody tells you women drivers are lousy, say that you know a lot of good women drivers, and you know a guy call Xiaohui, and he confess that he is a lousy driver.

The last area I would like to share on is advertising. Where is the line that we draw when we are not just reporting the facts, but trying to sell an idea? Where is the line when we are persuading people to buy a product? Are we being a false witness when we stand behind an idea that is misleading? It does seem unethical to fail to disclose the failures or negative features of a product. The same can be said if you are a housing agent, insurance agent or shop owner.

Of special importance is when we are witnessing for Christ. We must not overly inflate the promises, hopes and possibilities. We must not say that people who believe in Jesus will be happy all the time, or that their problems will disappear, or that they no longer need modern medicine. We don’t need to know all the doctrines or to memorize the bible by hard. But whatever we share, we ourselves must believe it to be the truth.

To conclude, Witnesses is something that is very valuable for a society to function properly, whether in the ancient legal system, or in the modern context. As Christians, we must be good witnesses because God is the truth, and our covenant with him is base on trust and faithfulness. Truth telling has its limits, and it must not destroy peace or cause others to be harmed or shamed. But that should not stop us from trying to tell the truth all the time, and refrain from gossip, from stereotyping, and from false advertising.

Tuesday, November 09, 2010

On Divorce

A topical sermon on Divorce.

Matt 5: 31-32: It has been said, “Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce.” But I tell you that anyone who divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness, causes her to become an adulteress, and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits adultery.

Today’s sermon is on the topic of divorce. This is a serious issue and a worrying trend. And if the church seeks to be relevant to the society, this issue must be addressed. On the other hand, it would be wildly presumptuous that we can solve this problem with a dictum that divorce is disallowed in the church. I will begin today’s sermon with this general premise that I will spell out clearly now. And the premise is this: I am not here to tell you whether divorce is allowed or disallowed in the church. And I hope nobody leaves this church today with the presupposition that divorce is allowed or disallowed in Christianity. The reason for this is a simple one. Allowing or disallowing divorce does not really resolve the issue itself. If there are serious problems in the marriage, disallowing divorce will not make those problems disappear. Couples in a marriage can be still married legally, but totally separated in reality. In the same manner, even if divorce is allowed, it does not mean that the problems are hence resolved. We know of many cases where the problems in the first marriage are carried over to the next marriage.

To put it more clearly, the question of “Is divorce allowed or disallowed?” is a very superficial one and in effect is a wrong question to ask. We should ask instead “How does God perceive divorce and marriages?” and “How do we make marriages work for Christians?” Even more dangerous than setting a legal pronouncement on divorce is to use the biblical text as direct backing for our foregone conclusions. I wish to lay out a direct warning that today’s text on divorce is a very tricky one and it has numerous interpretations over the entire church history. If we want to use any text in the Bible as a direct legal pronouncement over the issue of divorce, I’m afraid there isn’t one. Hence, this is an important consideration for us to be cautious about being overly judgmental about the issue of divorce. I believe that most people do not enter into a marriage aiming for it to be broken and unhappy. To those contemplating a divorce or others who have had a divorce before, which I must add is a growing number, divorce is a bitter experience that is surely to be avoided if it is possible. Hence, it is fruitless to take the moral high ground here and condemn those who are already in pain. We must remember also that a divorce not only involves the couple but also the family members. The Church is a place of a new hope and a new beginning, and we must be ever ready to provide a second chance. Let us put aside our prejudices and refrain from adding to the burden of those with a heavy heart. Hence we do not proceed to asking if divorce is allowed or disallowed. And we do not judge those that have taken this painful path.

On the other hand, being non-judgmental does not mean that the Bible is silent on the matter of divorce. In fact, it is very clear that God treats divorce as a serious matter. Being sensitive to those who are suffering does not mean that we become apathetic. In fact, it means we must go beyond the level of right and wrong, and grapple with the complex problems of marital conflicts. Only then are we being fully responsible in loving our neighbors and ourselves. Therefore, with the clear premise given in the introduction that we are not here to allow and disallow divorce, I shall proceed to share what the Bible says about divorce in three aspects. Firstly, it is how God perceives divorce. Secondly, it is on the danger of adultery. Lastly, it is on the responsibility of the people.

Firstly, the text begins with a quotation “Anyone who divorces his wife must give her a certificate of divorce”. This is most likely a quotation of the teachings by the religious leaders at that time. This line itself is not found in the Old Testament scriptures itself. But this does not mean that the teachers are intentionally deceiving or misleading. It is quite common during that time to shorten laws into short catchphrases, and these shortened forms are assumed to carry the entire meaning of the entire original law itself. What is the original law that is quoted? It is found in Deut 24:1-4.

“If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the Lord. Do not bring sin upon the land the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance.”

It is pretty difficult to decipher what exactly is the meaning of this law. It is also difficult to reconstruct the context of this law or the reason of its existence. What is described is that the woman, who is divorced from the first man, cannot be married back to that man, even if she is divorced from her subsequent marriages. This is the original usage of the certificate of divorce. To show whom she has been divorced from, and to ensure that she does not get married back to the same man she had been divorced from. Perhaps it is to protect the woman. So that she does not get repeatedly passed back to the same man who had once rejected her. Perhaps it is to protect the man, so he does not get defiled from marrying a defiled woman. Perhaps it is something about the distribution of the land and property rights. Like I said it is hard to reinterpret the original meaning of this law.

But one thing we can be sure, the interpretation of the religious leaders during Jesus’ time regarding the use of this law is inadequate, if not wrong. They had taken the first part of the law, “if a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house”, as justification for the right to divorce. The original meaning gives a special allowance in the special case of the husband “finding something indecent” about her as reasons for a divorce. This usually refers to sexual immorality, and most probably adultery. But the Jewish teachers have given greater emphasis to the earlier phrase “woman who becomes displeasing to him”, and this is the predominant interpretation even until today. Hence, it is permissible for a divorce even on grounds as trivial as burning one’s dinner. We can imagine the wives of those times having a hard time pleasing their husbands. And all the husband has to do for the divorce to take effect is to write a certificate of divorce. The woman is often left helpless and forced to seek another marriage because women in those times depend on men for survival.

Such an interpretation may be admissible in terms of linguistics and Hebrew semantics. The giving of a certificate of divorce is admittedly already a mark above the other cultures and in the past where women were just sent away, without a certificate she would have difficulty getting married to others because she cannot prove the divorce. We need to look no further than Abraham himself who was forced to send away Hagar with nothing to depend on, not even a certificate. We can read about that in Genesis 21. However, what is admissible in terms of language may not be the true meaning of the law. We know that laws today have to be written so that nobody can try to exploit any legal loopholes. But even then the legal word cannot be held above the spirit of the law, and it is this spirit that must be upheld. In this case, we have reasons to believe that laws are created to limit divorce, rather than promote it.

Deut 22:13-19 “If a man takes a wife and after lying with her, dislikes her and slanders her and gives her a bad name, saying, “I married this woman, but when I approached her, I did not find proof of her virginity,” then the girl’s father and mother shall bring proof that she was a virgin to the town elders at the gate. The girl’s father will say to the elders, “I gave my daughter in marriage to this man, but he dislikes her. Now he has slandered her and said, “I did not find your daughter to be a virgin.” But here is the proof of my daughter’s virginity.” Then her parents shall display the cloth before the elders of the town, and the elders shall take the man and punish him. They shall fine him a hundred shekels of silver and give them to the girl’s father, because this man has given an Israelite virgin a bad name. She shall continue to be his wife, he must not divorce her as long as he lives.”

Here we see a clear example of the law protecting the rights of women, and against unfair divorces taking place. It is therefore reasonable to assume that other laws relating to divorce are also in the spirit of protecting women, and limiting rampant or irresponsible divorces from taking place. Therefore, the interpretation of the religious leaders on the law given in Deut 24 is inadequate. If a divorce can be allowed simply because a man finds his wife detestable, and a divorce is finalized with a certificate, then the law is not protecting the rights of the women and it is against the spirit of limiting divorce from taking place. Furthermore, Jesus goes beyond just the spirit of the law to seek after the will of the Father. In Matt 19: 4 “Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator made them male and female and said ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate. He later said, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hard. But it was not this way from the beginning.” Here, Jesus makes clear that the allowance of the certificate of divorce is not a form of proof that God allows for divorce for whatsoever reason. The original intention of God is not so.

Here is an important concept that it is God himself that brings about marriage between male and female. It is God that puts them together. We might not follow the Catholic teaching that there is a real physical union of two persons into one. But still, the implication is that in a marriage God had meant for a couple to be so close, they are not separable. I am not setting up a new law here to disallow divorce because God does not permit it. If it is just another law, then we are no different from the Pharisees who are just interested in what is allowed, and what is not. But rather, knowing the original intention and design of God forces us who are believers of God to gain a correct perspective of marriage. A marriage is put together by God. It is not for convenience or selfish desires or fulfilling social norms. In marriage we receive God’s blessing, as well as his providence. Hence, if it is God that puts a marriage together, a certificate of divorce is powerless to dissolve it. This is why Jesus says that whoever divorces his wife causes her to be adulterous, and whoever marries her commits adultery. This is because the first marriage was never annulled, so how can a new marriage take place. Therefore the first point I want to bring out is that divorce is a serious matter to God and the religious leaders in thinking that a certificate of divorce will annul a marriage is deeply flawed. A marriage is put together by God and divorce in the sense of destroying the work of God is never desirable.

The second point that I would like to bring out is that Jesus has given special allowance here for divorce if adultery had first taken place. This is however not to be misinterpreted as if you want to have a divorce, then you need to commit adultery or if an adultery had already taken place then Jesus is promoting the idea of divorce. The special case here rather is to signify the destructive force of the sin of adultery. I will not be elaborating on the details of what constitutes adultery since that has already been covered in an earlier sermon. But perhaps now we should try to understand why a divorce is permissible in the case of adultery. As stated earlier, the reason why a divorce causes the divorced woman to become an adulteress is because the previous marriage was never annulled. However in the case of an adultery, the woman in question here is already in sin and hence you can’t make person who is already in adultery more in sin. Hence a point must be strongly emphasized here that adultery breaks up a marriage and all people in marriage must be strongly vigilant and guard against this temptation. This sin is so destructive it is as if the marriage, which is brought together by God, is destroyed to the extent of even being annulled.

But I would like to say once again that it is not the intention of Jesus to promote divorce in the occurrence of adultery. The situation here is only that a divorce in the case of adultery is understandable. However, as with all cases of sin, the ultimate desired result is not the breaking up of relationships but rather the reconciliation. With the occurrence of sin, we must be repentant and seek the forgiveness of God and your partner. We must feel the pain of a relationship broken up by sin and seek the cleansing and restoration that only God can bring about. It is precisely because the sin is big and that the hurt is deep that we can only turn to God for salvation. I know of some couples that are still together in marriage but the agony and grief of an adulterous incident in the past still lingers on. I applaud these people for their courage to stay together but they must also allow God to act in such a dire situation. For in God, we must believe that faith, hope and love abound and there is always a new beginning. Divorce does not truly solve the situation, instead it is the love that comes from God that will prove to be the one that will never fail.

Another point I want to bring up about this special exception that Jesus had brought up is that it is also an act of grace. We are humans and flesh and blood after all and sometimes the sufferings in this world are beyond what we can bear. It would be simple for God to just lay down a law to disallow all divorce but like I said, God’s intention is not to set up a law and order system but rather to help man in this world. I’m sure there are times where it is more painful for a couple to stay together than to be apart and we must not be so legalistic to force people to stay on together for the sake of it. The point of adultery is not meant to be a deterministic factor but rather an example of how sin can render a marriage to the brink of being annulled. Other situations such as spouse abuse, substance abuse, gambling habits and many others can all force a couple to contemplate a life of divorce as better than staying in marriage. While the first point is that divorce is never the intention of God, Jesus had in His grace allowed for some circumstances where it could happen.

The third point on this topic is a sharing of how I feel the church and the Christian community can work towards the elimination of divorce. Like I said earlier, the issue of divorce is not whether it is allowed or disallowed, but how God perceives it, and the circumstances in which a marriage is rendered broken. Since we know that God brings marriage together and that sin is a major destructive force in breaking up marriages, the Christian community has a responsibility to act against the infiltration of sin into a marital relationship. Of course a lot of this advice I am about to give is not directly lifted from the Bible but I believe it is in line with the Christian theology and the will of God.

Firstly, one should never enter into marriage lightly. It is no major surprise that many of the seeds of a full-blown divorce are planted from the very beginning of the marriage itself. What is the reason for the marriage and can this reason withstand the test of time? Have the issues of both parties entering into the marriage been resolved? Are they able to learn to accept one another? How are they like in the face of hardship? Needless to say, if these basic issues are not ironed out from the beginning, couples would surely be ill prepared to deal with an actual situation of conflict when it occurs in the marriage. Of course, you can never be Ms and Mr. Perfect, but you can work towards being Ms and Mr. Right. Lessons like commitment, patience and sensitivity start from the time of youth.

Secondly, besides entering into a marriage well prepared, a couple who is married must continue to work hard to keep a marriage intact. Besides the absolutely necessary element of keeping a healthy relationship with God through prayer and scripture reading, there are many other elements that help a marriage as well. One must learn to communicate. Know the seven languages of love. Know the differences between man and woman in the way they express themselves. If you don’t know the answer to “Do I look fat in this?”, maybe that’s why you always sleep on the sofa. Communication goes beyond the expression of feelings, but also involves conflict management, mutual guidance and even just a healthy discussion of ideas. Another element besides communication is good planning. Financial planning is crucial to prevent future woes. Family planning is to be prepared for major changes to lifestyles. But I think the most important of all is the planning in time and energy. If you don’t give the time to be together, you are bound to drift apart. But being together is not enough, if one is always watching TV and the other is doing housework. You must plan to develop common hobbies that promote interaction. Learn things together that enrich the uniqueness of this marriage. Let’s put it this way, you need barriers to entry in a marriage relationship. If you have spent years to develop into a special someone to a person and that person is groomed to be so special as to be only satisfied by you, then it is hard for a third party to butt in.

Lastly, it is the role of the church. We must continue to strive to become a community of support and love that couples can turn to when care and concern is needed. The church must avoid gossip, and also learn when to be silent and when to give advice. This is the bare minimum. This is only at the fire-fighting level, but instead we can make the church a place that couples can grow in maturity. We must promote openness in self-revelation, forgiveness in spirit and integrity in character. Through careful teaching and sharing of the Word, we make genuine believers that have fruits of the Spirit, such that they are ideal partners. They are honest in truth and kind in their hearts. They have the strength to withstand hardship and yet the wisdom to accept the Church and God as their help. They are diligent in the care of the family, and yet fun-loving with a good sense of humor.

The Church must also have a prophetic voice in this world which is sometimes simply not conducive to marriages. We must speak against gathering treasures on earth, which robs families of precious times together. We must speak against the use of the body and sex as objects of selfish lustful desires, which poison the minds with fantasies instead of truly knowing one another as created beings of God. We must speak of the paradox of forgiveness and righteousness, instead of a postmodern interpretation of morality and the vindictive nature of personal rights over others.

All these, the individuals and the church must do so that we are not there just to tell people to allow or disallow divorce. Divorce must be dealt with by spending effort working on the development of the self and on the marriage relationship. We see from the beginning that the Jewish religious leaders were only interested in validating their divorce by using the certificate of divorce as an excuse. In light of God’s intention for marriage, that is an unreasonable conclusion. Since it is God that puts marriages together, we must work towards treating marriage as sanctified and a very serious affair. The big pitfall that we must all be wary of is adultery. Adultery is extremely destructive and needs the intervention of God before true restoration can happen. But let’s not be worried and think that we are helpless before temptation. God has given us spiritual discipline to make us prepare before and during the marriage together with the church as a community. May God help every one of us.

Monday, November 08, 2010

On Sex

A topical sermon on Sex

Introduction
Today we continue the topical series on the body. And sermon title that is given is from sex to happiness. We are going to talk about sex, and how it can bring you happiness. It seems like a no-brainer. Well, those who are getting laid are happy and those who are not are … well… let’s just say they are not particularly happy about it. Some of you may be thinking. “It is hard enough getting any sex, now we have to have sex theologically? What have sex got to do with Christianity anyway?” Some of you might be thinking, “Is he going to talk about sex the entire sermon? Is that even allowed in church?” Yes, I will be talking about sex. And it will be PG-16.

Sex is a sensitive topic. I think there will be many images and ideas that will be popping up in your head when I mention the word sex. We need to approach this topic carefully because your idea of sex may be very different from mine, and the furthest thing I want is for somebody to misunderstand me on this topic and go out and claim Xiaohui said “this and that”. I will try to be as open as I can, and you must try to interpret my sharing in the most positive way possible.

Sex is also a wide topic. I do not aim to answer all your queries about sex today. Neither do I claim to be a sex expert or to understand every particular sexual problem. What I aim to do today is to emphasize to you the biblical perspective on the topic, and I sincerely hope that can be a guiding light to those struggling with sexual issues.

Because Sex is a sensitive and wide topic, it has often been trimmed down to a morality issue when it is discussed in church. We sometimes talk about sexual sins but we fail to address the nature of sex and the purpose of sexuality. Other times, it is relegated into an educational lesson for youths, and we presume as adults and especially those with children understand about sex. And even those who bother to find out more, often end up with Freudian paradigms and solve their problems using psychotherapy, but we must certainly question how much of Freud’s conclusions are biblical revelation, and is psychotherapy the only solution to sexual issues.

But the church must address the issue of sex, and approach it beyond a morality problem. If it remains at a moral domain, then our directions will purely be problem solving, and instructions will be reduced to preventive measures. To those outside the Christian community, our morality has no bearings to their lives. We also believe that sex means more than a functional process for procreation. While it is true that sex often leads to procreation, the same can be said about animals, but can we say that human sex is no different from animal sex? We must speak about sex and be well informed because sexuality is a part of humanity. Being human means that we are also sexual beings. How we express ourselves on the matter of sex indicates our understanding of our relationship with the human world. The church must speak about sex because the world speaks about sex. Ideas about what the world see about sex can be found in commercials, radio, talk-shows and public policies. If we do not seriously listen to what the bible has to say about sex, then we are forced into letting the world tell us what to think about this matter that is integral to everybody’s lives. So let’s begin with the basic question “What is sex?” And my answer, which is my first point, is “Sex is a Gift of oneself.”

Point 1
Read Genesis 2:20-25
To understand sex, we need to understand the origin of masculinity and femininity. This is a familiar passage and much expounded upon in weddings. We see in the beginning that woman is a divine gift from God to man. And in reciprocating his acceptance, he is also now a gift to the woman. This is a time before the fall, and we can see the original innocence in mankind. “The man and his wife were both naked, and they felt no shame. We can see that this innocence allows for a reciprocal experience of one another. In this relationship, they learn to grasp the idea of masculinity and femininity. Here we see that in the original relationship, woman is a gift for man, and accepted by the man as a gift. In the giving of herself, the woman discovers herself through the acceptance of the man. The man in his complete acceptance of the woman has presented himself as a gift to the woman. This mutual exchange is so interconnected that the giving itself becomes accepting, and the acceptance is transformed into giving. So we can understand that in the healthiest form of man-woman relationship, man and woman are a gift to one another, and the full acceptance of the gift is expressed in a reciprocal giving of oneself in return.

Read Genesis 3:6-10
After the Fall, after eating the fruits of the knowledge of good and evil, man and woman realize their nakedness and became afraid. The opposite of the initial mutual giving and accepting is the making of the other person into an object of possession. Man and woman feel their nakedness and were afraid, because they realized they could now become an object of desire and also discovering their corrupted thought in possessing the other person. What was previously a subject of giving and accepting has now become an object of possessing and guarding against.

Read Genesis 4:1
Now that we understand what is the original ideal for Man and Woman relationship and what is the opposite of the original design, we can now go on to comprehend what is sex in the theological understanding. In the original Hebrew language “Adam lay with his wife” is literally translated as “Adam knew his wife.” Sex is knowing and for the other partner, the giving of knowledge. From the beginning of creation, man and woman are called to become one flesh. This calling continues even after the fall, but we must understand its ideal and original intention from before the fall. Certainly part of this calling consist of the need for procreation and hence to be fruitful and multiply. But sex has to move beyond the basic understanding of biological reproduction because it is about a union that is so close that becoming one flesh has been defined as knowledge. In Luke 1:34, Mary says “How shall this be, since I know not man?” Thus, this knowing is not just for man but also for woman. Sex is knowing and the giving of knowledge. What is this knowledge? It is the awareness of the meaning of one’s sexuality. In the becoming of the one flesh, the man understands the meaning of his masculinity and he gives himself as a man to the woman. At the same time, he receives the meaning of femininity from the woman and accepts and welcomes it as a man. Let me repeat this from the perspective of a woman. In sex, the woman understands the meaning of her femininity and she gives herself as a woman to the man. At the same time, she receives the meaning of masculinity form the man and accepts and welcomes it as a woman. During the union, man and woman become one flesh, and understand their humanity and sexuality through their body. This can only be achieved when there is true giving of the person and true acceptance of one another. Sex is knowing because both man and woman is part of a self-revelation process. This is sex in its ideal form and it should be the natural process in a healthy man-woman relationship. So to repeat the first point: Sex is a Gift of oneself.

Reflection
I will be talking about the practical applications in my conclusion. But before I proceed to the next point, I would have to have a short time of reflection on the first point. Firstly, if we look at the way sex is expressed in the mass media today, how much of it conveys this mutual giving of one another during sex? More often than not, woman are portrayed as sexual objects to be used for sexual needs, rather than to be understood as sexual beings. With the increasing spending power of woman today, man has also been marketed as sexual objects based on looks, physique and power. The day you see people as objects of sexual desire rather than human beings of God’s creation, that is the day you have experienced the effects of the fall, and you will have fear in you instead of openness. Secondly, do you see yourself as a sexual object or a person to be known? This has a lot to do with the way you dress and your mannerism and the way you relate with others. You are not a woman based on how many man want to have sex with you, and similarly you are not a man based on how many woman you can bed. Your sexuality is God-given, and how much your sexuality is magnified is based on the kind sex you and your partner has. Lastly, which brings me to my final reflection. Based on such a theological understanding of sex, what kind of sex should you have? It should be a process of giving and accepting. You convey your sexuality through sex and you know yourself and your partner more through his/her giving as well. There should not be thoughts of possession or manipulation, but sharing and communication. Sex should make you realize that you and your partner has become one flesh.

Point 2
Our first point is that sex is a Gift and hence it is not to be taken lightly. However, with the strong emphasis on avoidance of sexual sins in church, many may have swung over to the other extreme. They see sex as dirty and unholy and should be abstained unless for purposes of procreation. These people glorify virginity and the deterrence of sex in marriage as a spiritual discipline. This is similarly unbiblical and unwise. And this is my second point: Sex is good and must be expressed in passion.

Read Song of Songs 4:16-5:1
The passage we have just read is a description of sex that occurred after a wedding. The entire book is filled with passages of passion and love. The groom has great admiration for the bride and the bride has great yearnings for the groom. The mood of the songs and tone of the language used clearly indicate that sexual love is a thing of great beauty and sex is an activity that enriches human life. The book teaches that love and sex are good. This is a message that is drastically different from those who think that sex is a unholy activity. This book shows that loving God with one’s heart and soul and loving a member of the opposite sex with one’s heart and flesh are not opposed to one another. The one who stays away from sex is not holier than the sexually active husband or wife. This book shows us that sex and love can be filled with passion and desire. Passion is the emphasis that the book wants to convey. References to sexual acts are fairly rare and usually indirect. However, the fervent desire that the couple have for each other is direct and blatant. Sex should not be a monotonous task for childbearing purposes. It can be one that is expressed through passion and yearning for each other. The north wind and south wind indicate the stormy night that the sex resembles. And the groom entering the beautiful garden indicates the magical setting of the union. Sex is respected as something to be enjoyed in the bible. But the enjoyment can only be appreciated within the limits of a covenant.

Read Song of Songs 8:6-7
We see that the couple passionately in love is bound by a covenant. It is in this covenant that their love is expressed. The woman’s name is sealed on the man and hence she demands his complete faithfulness. She is entitled to claim this faithfulness because such love, the bond of one flesh, is exclusive and jealous. This love is like death which is inescapable. The sex that they have experienced makes their love permanent. This covenant they share does not allow for rivalry and infidelity. This exclusivity indicates the seriousness of entering this relationship. So we see that the book calls for passion and yearning in a relationship. However it is not without its morality. Firstly, the relationship must be between a man and a woman. And secondly, this is a relationship in marriage and does not allow for unfaithfulness. Within such boundaries, we must allow for passion of love in the relationship. This passion that demands faithfulness is also a shield to unfaithfulness. If we make sex emotionless, it will only open doors to lust outside of the relationship. So this is my second point: Sex is good and must be expressed in passion.

Reflection
Let us have a time of reflection on the second point before I conclude. Firstly, we turn to the ideas about sex in the media world. Modern culture has great difficulty in seeing marriage as a promising setting for romance and passion. In current fiction and movies, hot passionate love is always found in an extramarital setting. We need to get rid of this myth that is pervading our society, that it is the forbidden fruit that taste the best. Passionate love for your wife is possible and sex with her can be better than the sweet young thing that don’t know the real you. Yearning and desire for your domesticated husband is possible, and he can be as attractive as the playboys that disrespect the sanctity of marriage. Secondly, do thoughts of sex make you uncomfortable and avoiding it make you think you are more holy? Sex is an activity respected in the Bible, and not only is it a important element in marriage, it is to be enjoyed by the couple. It strengthens the bond that the couple have for each other and it is a shield against temptations outside of the covenant. Lastly, based on this biblical understanding of sex, what kind of sex should you have? For those who are unmarried, there can be no sex. The Bible is clear that sex is between a man and a woman and is expressed in a marriage. I am not saying this because I am standing on a moral high ground, but simply because I understand what is sex and love. This expression of love demands faithfulness and it consumes your very being. Is this not the sex that is worth waiting for? For those who are married, bring love and passion back into your marriage. The yearning for one another must always be in your heart and mutual admiration must continue long after your wedding night. If you need tips on how to improve your romantic life, buy a good commentary on the Song of Songs.

Anecdote
Before I conclude, I wish to share something as a food for thought. Friday morning as I was driving to work, I was listening to Class 95. They were talking about faithfulness in marriage. The female DJ says she feels that it is better to marry a man who has sown his wild oats before marriage. The reason is that since he has experienced every thing, he will be faithful when he is married because he will not wonder what the outside world is like. The male DJ agrees with her, and says that if not for his religious conviction, he would have done the same. From the call-ins from listeners and previous experiences, I have reasons to believe that this is a prevailing thought. Sexual experiences with multiple partners are considered good to the outside world, and in this case even good for protecting a marriage. This is such an irony.

Conclusion
This brings me to my conclusion. I will use a Star-wars analogy for sex. Sex has a light side and a dark side. The dark side has many attractions with many attractions like multiple partners, illicit relationships, pornography and so on. But the satisfaction is temporal, and every time the “high” is over, you need to go further to get the next “high”. If you go down that road, it is doomed to failure and depression. But Sex has a light side, and it is the one given by God and highlighted today. It seems like a tough road because it requires faithfulness, communication and reflection. It is about giving and openness and becoming vulnerable at times. However, you will find that this satisfaction is eternal because through sex in this way, you will find and appreciate your true humanity and discover a partner of a lifetime. If you go down this road, you will find happiness.